Release Your LOADD!

Hi,
My name is Jonathan Naymark and I suffer from a condition; a condition that only recently has been properly identified by the Ontario College of Physicians and Health Canada. Known as Late-Onset Attention Deficit Disorder (LOADD), LOADD is hard to diagnose yet effects thousands of Canadians.

Almost two years ago I began to notice that I could no longer finish a Harvard Business Case in one sitting. It would take me days, even months to simply read the A Case. When I was younger, I remember sitting at the park and reading case after case, my appetite for business cases was practically insatiable. My growing inability to focus coincided almost directly with my return to school. Once again a student I suddenly found it difficult to concentrate during my mandatory statistics class; was that regression random, or was someone bbm’ing me? Financial accounting? Account me out; there was status liking to do be done on Facebook instead.

Sound familiar? Clearly, I am not alone. In fact Late-Onset Attention Deficit Disorder (LOADD) impacts thousands of Canadians, and hundreds of new cases are self-diagnosed daily.

What exactly is LOADD? Well I’m glad you asked. While ADD is a condition that afflicts younger children, LOADD is a condition known to only inflict twenty-somethings who are in professional school programs. The greatest number of LOADD sufferers are in their final year of a post-bachelor degree.

There is no cure for LOADD. Doctors believe, however, that LOADD may be situational and that it IS possible to lose your LOADD at some point in the future.

If you are wondering if you too may suffer from LOADD, doctors have developed the following Top Ten List:

1. You cannot concentrate long enough to read a top ten list.
2. I cannot concentrate long enough to make a top ten list.
3. Monkeys!?
4. I love chocolate milk!
5. Am I hungry?
6. No I’m thirsty.
7. Exercise.
8. Your mind.
9. Homework.
10. Gossip Girl.

With the surge of LOADD Sufferers, there is now a national support group that all those inflicted with LOADD are welcome to join. The group is known as Late Onset Attention Deficit Disorder Sufferers (LOADDS) and they can be reached online via their website: www.releaseyourloadd.org.

“We like it when people bust into a LOADDS meeting,” declared LOADDS President Cyndi Macelrone; in fact sufferers are joining the group by the hundreds. “LOADDS are popping out of the woodwork," Cyndi declared. Cyndi, a 2009 graduate of the Schulich School of Management, was diagnosed with LOADD in early February of 2009. She founded LOADDS in March but became distracted by NCAA March Madness. It was only when she finished school that she was able to restart the group, “Our goal is for everyone who suffers from LOADD to dump their LOADD on us. I believe that through group therapy, LOADD can be erad... Hey! Do you hear that music playing? I think its the new Lady Gaga song."
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In no way does this "note" aim to hurt anyone who has, or knows someone who has, been diagnosed with ADD, or ADHD. Those are two very real conditions and should not be made fun of.